A New Dictionary

Usless conversions

Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = 1 Eskimo Pi
2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
1 millionth mouthwash = 1 microscope
Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knot-furlong
Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon
1000 aches = 1 megahurtz
Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond
The first step of a one-mile journey = 1 Milwaukee
1 million microphones = 1 megaphone
1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
365.25 days = 1 unicycle
2200 mockingbirds = two kilomockingbirds
10 cards = 1 decacards
1000 grams of wet socks = 1 literhosen
1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
10 rations = 1 decoration
100 rations = 1 C-ration
10 millipedes = 1 centipede
3 1/3 tridents = 1 decadent
10 monologs = 5 dialogs
5 dialogs = 1 decalog
2 monograms = 1 diagram
4 nickels = 2 paradigms
2 wharves = 1 paradox
100 Senators = Not 1 decision
One acre is exactly 43,560 square feet = a lotsa toes